Say This Instead › Throwing Objects

What to say when your toddler throws things

For when toys or items are thrown during play or frustration

🗣 Say this
"Toys aren't for throwing. If you throw it again, I'm going to put it away for the rest of the day."
⏱ What to do
1
State the boundary calmly and once
2
If they throw again, remove the object immediately without drama
3
Don't return the object for the rest of that play session
4
Offer a safe alternative if they need to throw: a soft ball outside
5
Reconnect once they're calm. No lingering punishment
⚠️ Avoid
❌Throwing things back to show them how it feels
❌Warning repeatedly without following through
❌Long lectures about safety while they're dysregulated
❌Making them feel like a bad person
🔁 If they resist
"That toy is done for today. We can try again tomorrow."
→Remove it calmly and redirect
💡 Pro tip
Give them somewhere safe to throw: outside with a ball
Instead of
"How many times do I have to tell you not to throw things?!"
Try
"We don't throw toys." (remove it) "Want to throw the ball outside instead?"

Common questions

What should I say when my toddler throws toys?
Say calmly: "Toys aren't for throwing. If you throw it again, I'm going to put it away for the rest of the day." Follow through immediately if they throw again. Remove it without anger and without a lecture.
Why does my toddler throw things?
Throwing is a developmental impulse and also often a bid for reaction. Toddlers throw when they're frustrated, seeking sensory input, testing cause and effect, or looking for a response from you. A big reaction makes throwing more rewarding.
How do I stop my toddler from throwing toys?
State the boundary once, follow through consistently, and offer a legitimate throwing outlet: a soft ball outside, a target game, or a basket to throw soft items into. Meeting the impulse safely reduces the need to throw inappropriately.
Should I take toys away when my toddler throws them?
Yes, as a natural consequence rather than a punishment. The toy goes away for the rest of that play session, calmly and without drama. No lectures. No prolonged consequences. It reconnects the action directly to the outcome.

Need the words in the moment?

Say This Instead gives you calm, ready-to-use scripts for 30+ real toddler situations, right when you need them, even offline.

Open the app. It's free to try

Other situations

✊

Hitting

When they strike out at you or others

 🍽

Throwing food

When food gets thrown at mealtimes

 🌪️

Full tantrum

When they're completely overwhelmed

 😱

Screaming and yelling

When they shout instead of communicate